Review: Ted

Lots of movies are guilty of a very common sin, that being they include all the best parts and clips in the trailers.  This is especially true of comedies, and one good example of this for me was Talledega Nights.  I can't remember a single moment of that film that wasn't included in the previews, which ruined the film for me.

Ted is the complete opposite of that concept.  The best stuff in the movie can't be shown in the previews because all the best moments are adult in nature.  It's a wonder anything remotely funny can be aired on television ads and avoid looking like nonsense.  Somehow the marketing team put together enough clips on television that are suitable in order to gain attention, but that couldn't possibly be an easy task.

Mark Wahlberg is John, a 35-year-old man who, when he was a boy in 1985, got a teddy bear for Christmas.  He wished that same night that Teddy could speak and act on his own, and when he woke up the next morning, he found out his wish came true.  At first Ted is lovable and cute, and he quickly becomes a celebrity by appearing on news broadcasts and The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson.

Fast forward to present day.  John is now working at an auto rental company, and he's been dating his girlfriend Laurie (Mila Kunis) for nearly 4 years.  Ted is still John's best friend, but his 15 minutes of fame have long since passed, and he's now a celebrity that most people have forgotten about (that right there is a possibly storyline that could have been used as the backbone for the movie, since that is an idea that would be ripe for comedy too).  Ted lives with John and Laurie and generally interfering in their relationship by taking bong hits while watching 80s cult classics like Flash Gordon and Masters of the Universe.

Laurie grows more and more annoyed with Ted's antics and forces John into the position of kicking Ted out of their apartment.  Now on his own Ted - who, I feel obligated to remind you, is a teddy bear - is forced to get a job as a grocery store cashier to provide for himself.

This whole story could have still been funny had Ted been a human being, but the sight of a teddy bear taking bong hits, drinking beer, and making sexual advances on women puts a new spin on the idea.  It's sort of a one-joke movie with substituting a teddy bear in place of any human being in the role, but it works.

Ted is the brainchild of Seth MacFarlane, the creator of Family Guy and American Dad.  MacFarlane wrote, directed, and voiced Ted in the film, and he makes a couple references to his previous works in the movie.  He also tossed in a few cameos that I dare not spoil for anyone who hasn't yet seen the movie; they are all priceless.

Network television only allows MacFarlane to go so far with his style of comedy, even while using animation.   Ted is truly MacFarlane Unchained, so any parent going into this movie thinking a comedy about a grown man and his childhood teddy bear better think twice about taking their kids to see this (in fact, I had spotted a woman carrying her daughter who was around 4 years old in the theater, which horrified me).  I don't know if MacFarlane can continue making movies while also running his animated series, but if he does he will certainly have a bright future ahead of him.  This is probably the funniest movie of the summer and possibly the funniest movie we'll get this year.